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This is what awesome looks like
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I'm awesome in bed - I can sleep for hours
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Awesome
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Drunk and awesome
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I'm freakin awesome
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Awesome as f
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Awesomeness
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#Awesome
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I'm not perfect - I'm awesome
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I'm not perfect - Just awesome
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You had me at awesome
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I'm awesome
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Boobies are awesome
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Trust me, I'm awesome
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Totally awesome
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When I get sad I stop being sad and be awesome
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I'm not drunk, I'm awesome
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I don't get drunk - I get awesome
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Awesome, check
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Awesome, check
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I'm awesome but I even things out
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Awesome
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Fuckin' Awesome
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Aka Awesome
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Captain Awesome
Ladies please one at a time
I may be wrong - But I doubt it
It's never too late to give up
No probllama
Why be part of the problem
Growing old is mandatory - Growing up is optional
I don't make mistakes - I date them
Vegetarian is an old indian word for bad hunter
Sheep mooing
You can either agree with me or not disagree
Who needs hair with a body like this
Pretty sure I seized the wrong day
I'm not like other kids, I'm in my 40s
Free shrugs
Have you tried turning it off and back on again
It seemed like a good idea at the time
Bear with me
Alcohol you later
Don't blame yourself - Let me do it
Why be difficult
I'm not as dumb as you look
Ew. People
May contain alcohol
Ladies, mansplaining is short for man explaining
Success trains failure complains
If i agreed with you, we would both be wrong
I Wasn't Listening - So I'm Gonna Nod, Smile ...
Nope
World's best farter - I mean father
